Last post before Logan is born!

WHEW...WHAT A WEEKEND! I'll start off by saying that I've been in labor for 4 days. Yes, 4 days. Before I get to how it started, I want to say to all the men out there that if you are a soon-to-be daddy or want to have children in the future, just realize how hard labor is for your partner and do ANYTHING and EVERYTHING you can to comfort her. With that being said, I'm the luckiest girl in world to have Jordan right now. He has been so incredibly wonderful and has done everything in his power to take care of me these past 4 days. Here's the story...(might be TMI for some so don't say I didn't warn you!)

I turned off the terb pump last Wednesday and took the site out of my leg. That night, I had TONS of braxton hicks contractions throughout the night. Nothing painful, but definitely annoying. Thursday, I woke up feeling ok and around 11:30 I started feeling crampy. Again, nothing major but definitely something I had not been feeling. It was like mild period cramps that were constant and not going away. Along with these, I was still having braxton hicks. I started timing them and then were coming every 10-12 minutes all the way until my doctor appt on Friday. I just assumed this was all from stopping the pump, which I guess it was...but I didn't expect to hear what the doctor said on Friday.

Friday morning rolls around and I go to my appt at 10 am. They did the ultrasound first and then I saw my doctor. There was a line of ladies waiting to have their non-stress tests so I saw my dr first. When he came in, I told him about my mild cramping and that I had been having contractions every 10-12 minutes since 11:30am on Thursday. He checked me and said I was 1cm dialated and then he proceeded to strip my membranes. This is when the bag of water gets separated from the uterus. INSTANTLY, I could feel my cramping get more intense. I sat up and said, "Um, am I supposed to be feeling something?" My dr said, "YEP." He then told me to go out to lunch, walk the mall for a couple of hours, and come back to the office to get monitored to see what my contractions were doing. He then said that he predicted Logan would be here within the next 24 hours. I must have looked like a deer in headlights. Jordan gets off work at 11 on Fridays so I called him and said to hurry and meet me at the house to get our stuff loaded in the car. My dad took me home and Jordan and I began running around packing last minute things. We hopped in the car and headed to the mall! I ate some lunch and we began walking. At this point, things were definitely picking up and I had to stop every few minutes because my back was hurting so bad and my right leg kept going numb. The pain I was feeling, and am still feeling today, is back labor. OUCH. It's like someone is pinching a nerve. Along with this feeling, when the contractions come it feels like someone is squeezing my ribcage as hard as they can and it makes breathing really hard. Soooo....we walked and then headed back to the doctor. I got hooked up to the monitor and things had definitely picked up. I was contracting every 6-8 minutes by this point. However, it was still not enough progress to be sent to labor and delivery. Darn. He checked me again and I was still only 1cm dialated.

So, home we went. :( We came home and I got in bed for a little while. Once traffic died down, I put on my walking shoes and some comfy clothes and we headed to Target to walk some more. Again, I had to keep stopping to catch my breath and so Jordan could rub my back when the pain would start. After walking there for a bit, we went to dinner. Contractions were still 6-8 minutes apart and my dr said don't go to labor and delivery until they were 5 minutes apart or less. SHOOT. We went home and I got into bed and tried to sleep. By this point, I was starting to get super sore...everywhere. On top of all these contractions and pressure, remember that I haven't been up and really walking in 14 weeks. My body was weak and hurting. Sleep that night was pretty rough. Getting in and out of the bed to go to the bathroom made me want to cry.

I made it to Saturday morning and woke up feeling like someone had beaten me with a bat...mostly between my legs. (Sorry...TMI, I know. But it hurt so bad and it felt like a canon ball was trying to push it's way through. Oh wait, that's just my son's GIGANTIC head. Lordy.) I got up at 7 am and told Jordan I had to walk. I wanted to get the contractions closer together again. We went for a walk around the neighborhood and then I started making laps through the house. Contractions were still 6-8 min apart but I was feeling so much pressure. My mom eventually convinced me to go to labor and delivery to just get checked to see if I had dialated anymore. So, at 11:30am we went to get checked. Thank goodness it wasn't busy at all and they took me straight back. I got hooked up to the monitor, contractions were the same, and then the nurse checked me and I was only 1.5cm. UGH. So, home we went to labor on. We came home and I crawled into bed to try to get some rest. My body was hurting so much. Through all of this, I still wanted to do something "fun" since I now had permission to be up and moving around. Going to the movies was out of the question...I couldn't sit that long. Going walking some more did not sound like fun. So, we called our families and treated them all to dinner at Outback. It was nice to visit with everyone, get out of the house, and say thank you for everything the all have done for us. We came home and I went to bed pretty early. I actually slept ok on Saturday night, but I did have some pretty intense contractions that night that woke me out of a dead sleep and left me sweating and in serious pain. Jordan was great and rubbed my back and legs most of the night.

When I woke up on Sunday, the contractions had spread waaaay out...like not even in a pattern anymore. I was so discouraged and exhausted that I told Jordan that I didn't want to try to speed up the process anymore. I just wanted to enjoy the day, rest, stay in bed. However, I did want some crepes for breakfast so Jordan, his brother, and I went to Ihop for breakfast. It was yummy. We came home and I stayed in bed until about 4:30. I got up to shower and then we went over to Jordan's brother's for dinner. It was nice to visit and a great way to end an uneventful day. Tried going to bed early, but that didn't happen. I finally fell asleep close to midnight, but hardly slept. I think it was also because all I could think about was Tuesday and how close it was!

Woke up this morning at 6:30am and have been up ever since. The contractions still have no pattern, but my back and the pressure in between my legs has been intense all day. My dad came over and we went to lunch, to see some of the office staff at my school, and then to Target. It was so GREAT to see some of the people I work with! I can't wait to share pictures with them tomorrow. While at Target, I had to lean on a cart as I walked because my back was hurting so bad. My dad then brought me home and I'm back in bed for now. I still need to do a little laundry and pack some last minute things, but I think I'll wait until Jordan gets home from work. I think we're going to out for dinner tonight for our last "date" before requiring a babysitter. haha. So...that was our eventful weekend. As much pain as I've been in, I'm still glad I was able to get out of the house so many times this weekend.

I just can't believe it's almost here! I can't believe this part of the journey is finally almost over and I will be a Mommy TOMORROW! Wow, you have no idea how good it feels to say that. I doubt I will sleep much tonight. The only other time I've ever been this excited was when the chapel doors open at our wedding and I saw Jordan standing at the end of the aisle. It's like getting on a rollercoaster, waiting to take off, feeling the butterflies, hearing the click-click-click, and then throwing your hands up in the air. It's scary and exciting at the same time! I'm so ready for tomorrow to get here and get this party started!

So...tomorrow is my son's birthday. WOW. My son. That still sounds to crazy to me. I'm going to be someone's Mommy. I can't wait to see his little face and snuggle him anytime I want. The induction starts at 5 am. Jordan will update our friends as soon as possible and I'm sure we'll get some pictures up on Facebook by the end of the day. Thank you everyone for your thoughts, prayers, visits, EVERYTHING. Our little family is truly blessed to be so loved. My next post will be Logan's birth story!

Here is a comparison picture of my "bump" from the beginning to the end. I can't believe I won't have a "bump" anymore! I will surely miss feeling this little guy squirm around in my tummy, but having him in my arms will be even better. :)

***Click on the picture to make it bigger. :)

36 Weeks...ONE WEEK TO GO!!!

How far along? 36 weeks, 1 day
Weight gain/loss: +15/16 from pre-pregnancy
Maternity clothes? mix of both...looking forward to wearing my old clothes again! It will be like shopping for FREE!
Stretch marks? So blessed to not have a single one! Again, thank you Mom for your good genes :)
Sleep? SOOOOOO much better. I wake up once an hour to use the restroom, but I fall right back asleep. However, I think these last few nights are going to be harder to sleep because I'm so excited.
Best moment this week? So many this week!
1. Jordan gave me my LAST progesterone shot.
2. We set an induction date.
3. Jordan took me to get a haircut on Friday. I hadn't had one since the end of August. I had her cut off more than I would have liked just because I don't know when the next time I will get one will be. It's amazing how a simple haircut can make you feel like a new woman! :)
4. Jordan got me out of the house on Sunday and we went to visit with our parents.
5. Finished my home monitoring on Tuesday! I can't tell you how exciting it is to never have to hook myself up again to be monitored...oh wait, I guess I still have to get through labor. haha
6. Got my stitch out.
7. Went to Chuy's last night for a belated Valentine's Day with Jordan.
8. Turned off the Terbutaline pump and took the site out of my leg today. This makes me excited, but nervous!
9. Soaking up these last few days/nights with my wonderful Husband before the little man joins our family!
Food cravings: Still drinking a lot of milk. Finished a whole gallon all to myself...I've NEVER done that.
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In...I guess it's never going to POP. Oh well, maybe that means it will go back to my cute pre-pregnancy belly button pretty quickly. ha
Movement? Still a wild one. He loves to kick like crazy during my non-stress tests.
What I miss? Nothing...the best will be here in 6 days!
What I'm looking forward to: 2/22/11
Milestones: Making it to 36 weeks/9 months!

Not much to report. It's been a very eventful week full of milestones and accomplishments. I never ever ever knew how strong I was until now. Looking back on the past 9 months, I'm proud of what I have gone through and the person it has made me become. I have not taken a single second of this pregnancy for granted. My baby is truly a miracle and he and I already have such a strong bond. These last 6 days are going to be bitter sweet. As eager as I am to meet this little guy, it's going to be sad to not have him wiggling around in my stomach every day. I talk to him ALL THE TIME since it's just the two of us hanging out during the day. Soon enough, it will be time to share my precious boy with the world. I can't thank my friends and family enough for all of the prayers, support, and words of encouragement throughout these past 9 months. Logan is one LOVED baby and he has so many people ready to welcome him into this world.

These last 6 days are going to be crazy. Jordan is at an important training for work today and tomorrow, so Logan needs to STAY. PUT. Now that I'm totally off of the terb pump, I'm so nervous. Excited, but nervous. Anything can happen between now and Tuesday. Being the planner that I am, I like the fact of knowing that Tuesday will be the day. We still have a few last minute things to do and thinking that there is nothing stopping labor now makes me a little anxious.

Here's our agenda for the next 6 days:
Wednesday: lay low and not do ANYTHING to bring on labor...Jordan has a training for work and company dinner tonight
Thursday: same as Wednesday minus a company dinner
Friday: LAST doctor appt at 10 am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Non-stress test, ultrasound, office visit. My doctor is the one on call all weekend (how perfect!) so I don't have to worry about another doctor delivering Logan if I were to go into labor before Tuesday. Jordan will be running last minute errands after he gets off work at 11.
Saturday: The maid is coming one more time to scrub the house. I want Logan to come home to a fresh, clean home. We might go out to a nice dinner.
Sunday: no real plans...enjoying our last Sunday without baby
Monday: Jordan will go to work and I will make sure everything is ready to go for the hospital
Tuesday: We have to be at the hospital at 5 am...OUCH. It will be super early, but I have a feeling I won't be getting much sleep the night before anyway. Induction starts at 5 and hopefully we will have a baby boy by the end of the day!

I feel like time is moving soooo slow right now. HURRY UP TUESDAY! :)

My next to last bump picture! We will get one more the morning of the induction since I will be 37 weeks:

35 weeks!

How far along? 35 weeks
Weight gain/loss: I'll find out on Friday
Maternity clothes? mix of both
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? SOOOOOO much better. My itching is very minimal now and I've been taking Tylenol PM at night.
Best moment this week? Getting all Logan's laundry done, organized his closet/drawers/gifts from the shower, and we got all the final necessities for baby boy! We're ready to go!
Food cravings: Very odd but I've been drinking lots of milk lately! Normally, I only drink it in cereal. I finished almost a gallon to myself in a matter of days. hmmm...
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? 24 hour dance party still going strong! He has a little foot that likes to jet out on my right side. He thinks it's funny until I tickle it. hehe
What I miss? Not missing much these days because I'm so focused on how our lives are going to change in less than 2 weeks!
What I'm looking forward to: getting the stitch out...T-MINUS ONE WEEK!
Milestones: There's a saying between pregnant women...35/35. It means you're 35 weeks and 35 days away from your due date. Lucky for us, we don't have to wait 35 more days! AAAAHHH

I'll start with an update about my weekend. My Mom came over around noon on Saturday to help me "nest." Since we only have 1-2 weekends left before Logan's arrival, I was starting to panic. What I thought would take us maybe 2 hours took us SEVEN....but we got so much done! Here's what we did:
-washed all bottles/pacifiers and put them away
-washed newborn and 0-3 month clothes
-hung up all of his clothes and put them in order by sizes
-washed all blankets, sheets, crib pads, socks, mittens, hats
-put all of the above away
-organized all bathroom necessities
-organized the changing table/bookshelf area
I'm sure I'm forgetting more. I had hoped to pack our hospital bags, but after 7 hours of the other stuff, I was beyond exhausted...and all I really did was sit in the same spot and fold clothes or put them on hangers. I am SO thankful to have had my Mom's help! She has been soooo great in helping me prepare the nursery and get all the last minute items. I don't know what I would have done without her. Logan sure is lucky to have a MiMi who loves him and his mommy so much!

Yesterday was my last visit with the high risk doctor...WOOHOO! Before the appointment, my Dad and I met my Mom for lunch at Cafe Express near her office. It was nice to go out to eat again, but I was pretty uncomfortable the whole time. When you've been in a bed for the past 87 days (yes, I'm counting!), simple excursions outside of the house can be very exhausting. After we ate, my Dad took me to my appointment. I had the first appointment time after lunch so I thought we'd be in and out in no time. HA. We sat in the waiting room for an hour before finally getting called back. UGH...I hate OB appointments. Why do doctors schedule more appointments than they can handle in one day? It's never made sense to me. Anywho...she did an ultrasound to check on Logan. His head is still in the 98th percentile (measuring 38wks 5 days) and all of his other measurements were over 36 weeks. When you combine all the measurements, the average was that he is about 37 weeks, 1 day. Best of all, his weight was estimated at 6lbs 11oz. HOLY COW. He is in the 75th percentile right now and the doctor said that I am growing a VERY healthy baby! The weight measurement is never accurate. It could be +/- ~1lb in either direction. They get the estimate by taking measurements of the baby's head, belly, and thigh bone and then put it into a formula to get the weight. At any rate, Logan is bigger than average and healthy. The fact that he is measuring so far ahead is due in part to the steroid shots I had at 24 weeks. However, he has been measuring big since my first ultrasound and my doctor said since Jordan and I are big people, I might just have big babies. Fine by me...I love chunky monkeys! Not much else to report about the appointment. She is in agreement with my regular OB about my weekly visits, taking the stitch out next week, and inducing at 37 weeks due to the cholestasis. She said she would do the exact same thing, so that makes me feel good.

Lastly, I would like to do a little shout-out to my AMAZING Husband. I fall in love with him more and more every day and we have become so incredibly close during this journey. When we found out we were pregnant, we thought the 9 months ahead of us would be a breeze. Why wouldn't they be? Up until 22 weeks, he made sure to be at EVERY doctor's appointment. I was having them every 2 weeks and he didn't miss a single one. When I was in the hospital, he spent many uncomfortable nights on a hard pull out chair just so I wouldn't have to be alone. He would bring me dinner every night so I wouldn't have to eat the nasty hospital food and he would bring along a "surprise" or two to cheer me up. After I was released, he converted a corner of the bedroom into my snack station. He stocks my fridge at night, takes care of the grocery shopping, pays all the bills, makes dinner every night, does my laundry, picks up the house, and runs errands for me. He does all of this without complaining. I seriously have not heard him complain about ONE.SINGLE.THING. I will be the first to admit that it has not been easy to live with a hormonal, pregnant woman on bed rest. He lets me cry on his shoulder and then gives me pep talks. He works hard to make sure I am comfortable and happy. He leaves for work every morning before 5 am and doesn't get home some nights until 7 pm. Before he leaves every morning, he walks into our dark room and whispers, "Tay-Tay!" He tells me and Logan he loves us and hopes we have a great day. Every day. And even after all we have been through, he still wants to have more babies with me. LOVE. He is my best friend and I couldn't get through this without his positive attitude. Last night, he shocked me yet again. He came home at 7:30 pm in a great mood. He walked in the bedroom and said, "I have surprises!" He did something I never would have expected from him. He went shopping for our son all by himself and spoiled Logan rotten. He bought toys and picked out some cute t-shirts all by himself. To see how excited he was to show me made my heart melt. I can tell he is getting REALLY excited to meet his baby boy. Everyone always asks how I'm doing and wants to make sure I'm okay, but no one really asks how he is doing...and he's okay with that. However, I am beyond amazed at his strength. He has a lot on his shoulders right now and he still puts me and our son above all others. He would rather work long hours all week and stay home with me on the weekend than be anywhere else. Most weekends, I have to force him to go out and do something with his friends. He always tells me he would rather stay home with me since I can't leave the house, but I know how much responsibility he has around here and I know how important it is to have a somewhat normal life every once in a while. Jordan, you are an incredible man and you are going to be an excellent father! I can never repay you for all you have done for our family. Logan and I are blessed beyond words to have you in our lives and we love you more than you will ever know!

Here are some of the goodies Jordan bought for our baby boy:
St. Patty's Day t-shirt for next year:Valentine's Day t-shirt for next year:Beatles shirt for when he is a toddler:
35 Week "Bump":

Goal #2: 34 weeks...CHECK!!

How far along? 34 weeks
Weight gain/loss: same as last week
Maternity clothes? mix of both
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? Not great, but getting better now that I'm on the medicine for the cholestasis
Best moment this week? My Mom and Dad gave me an early Valentine's present this weekend. They had a necklace made with TLJ monogrammed on it. I LOVE it!
Food cravings: Nothing really
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? 24 hour dance party still going strong!
What I miss? I could go for a glass of wine!
What I'm looking forward to: getting the stitch out
Milestones: 34 weeks was the original goal my doctor wanted me to get to back when I was in the hospital. I'd say I've done pretty darn good!

Today I had my weekly non-stress test. Baby's heart rate looked great and he was moving up a storm. I have to go back on Friday for my weekly ultrasound and then I will be getting the Group B Strep Test (everyone gets this towards the end of their pregnancy). My doctor will be out of town so I will be seeing another doctor in the practice. Apparently there is a chance for snow on Friday so if that's the case, my doctor doesn't want me coming in. He said I would have to go to Labor and Delivery at the hospital on Saturday to have the ultrasound and strep test. I really hope that won't be the case...what a pain in the butt.

The most exciting news is that we will be having a FEBRUARY baby!!! I will FOR SURE be holding my son in my arms within the next 3 weeks. Here's the game plan:
2/4-ultrasound and strep test
2/8-appointment with the high risk doctor
2/11-non-stress test
2/15-remove cerclage and stop the pump, monitoring, progesterone shots
2/22 (or sometime that week)-HAVE A BABY!!!!
I will be getting induced at 37 weeks due to the cholestasis risks, unless my body goes into labor on its own once the stitch is removed. I am soooooo excited. I only have to go through all this mess for 3 more weeks until I finally get the PRIZE! There is a light at the end of the tunnel! :)

Not much else to report...my itching is slowly getting better now that the medicine I'm on has been in my system for almost a week now. It is much more bearable and I can now get some sort of sleep at night.

34 Week bump pictures:

We're getting closerrrrrr....

Sometimes it feels like I've been pregnant forever...and sometimes it feels like it's going by SO FAST. I can't believe that tomorrow is February and there is a VERY good chance our little March lucky charm will turn into a February love bug. aahhhh. Logan is all I can think about these days. I go in his room, sit in his glider, and just stare at everything. My lifelong dream of becoming a Mommy is weeks away and I could not be more excited. It also makes my heart so happy to see how excited Jordan is getting. This baby is all we talk about these days and I love when he kisses me goodbye in the morning and says, "You two have a great day!" He really is going to be the best Daddy. I love how he talks to my tummy every night before bed and how Logan jumps as soon as he hears his Daddy's voice. I can't wait to start this brand new journey with my two favorite boys! We are going to have SO. MUCH. FUN. :)

My last post was kind of depressing...sorry about that. After I wrote everything, I had one of the worst nights. I was unbelievably tired and the itching was insane that night. I fell asleep pretty easily around 8:30. When I got up for one of my 500 restroom breaks, I was thinking, "wow...I fell asleep fast and it must be 3 or 4 am." I looked at my phone before getting back into bed...big mistake. It was only 10 pm. I immediately burst into tears. The itching was so bad and I didn't know how I was going to be able to fall back asleep. I didn't want to wake Jordan up so I called my Mom and just bawled like a baby. She convinced me to take 2 Benadryl to knock myself out. I took an Aveeno bath, took 2 Benadryl, and went out on the couch to watch tv so I wouldn't bother Hubs. Needless to say, the medicine worked pretty quickly. I passed out almost immediately and woke up around 1 am to go get back in bed. I felt pretty good the next morning. It's amazing what no sleep will do to an already hormonal pregnant lady. It's not pretty.

On Friday, I had a biophysical ultrasound to check on our little man. They checked his heart and the blood flow through his umbilical cord. All looks well!! I then, briefly, met with my doctor and I mentioned the no sleeping thing. He suggested trying Tylenol PM instead. I've been taking that ever since and, knock on wood, I've been able to sleep a little better. He also said my appointments will now be every Tuesday and Friday until I deliver. He doesn't want to let me go more than 3-4 days without seeing a doctor. Fine by me!! I LOVE seeing my baby and hearing his little heart beat. It is the most wonderful thing in the world. Next appointment is tomorrow, 34 weeks!!!, and I will have another non-stress test. It's hard to believe that I only have TWO more weeks until the stitch comes out, the pump comes out of my leg, I don't have to do any more monitoring, and Jordan doesn't have to give me my weekly shot. CRAZY! Jordan and I have big plans for the day I get the stitch out! We are going out to dinner and making a trip to Target. haha. I promised him I would sit in a wheelchair or use a motorized scooter so I didn't have to walk. I don't care what anyone says, I deserve to go out and do these 2 things!!!

I promised in my last post to talk about my baby shower. WOW! It was truly amazing. Two of my wonderful sister-in-laws, Amber and Jenny, went all out for their nephew. They have been planning this since we announced we were pregnant. They are SO excited to meet Logan and it makes me so happy to see how much love they already have for this little boy. I didn't have a clue as to anything that was going to happen. The only specifications I gave Amber was that I didn't want the typical "baby blue" baby shower. I hate the color baby blue...yuck. They chose a Dr. Seuss theme and everything was decked out in primary colors. It was adorable. The original plan was to have it at Amber's house, but that changed when I was put on bed rest. They came over about 10 am on Saturday morning and I was summoned to stay in my room until everything was ready. When I finally got the ok to go out and see everything, I started crying. Everything was so cute and well thought out. They had spent so much time making everything so special for me and baby boy. I just kept thinking, "Wow. I'M having a baby. This is for MY baby." It was very surreal. We had an awesome turnout...around 20 people, great food, delicious cake (duh...Jenny made it!), cute favors, and Logan was spoiled rotten. I have been so worried about getting all the necessities since I've been on bed rest. My friends definitely helped ease my anxiety. Logan got so many awesome things!

Since we potentially only have 2 more weekends, maybe 3, we will be tying up all the loose ends ASAP. I have ordered some final things we absolutely need right away and they should be delivered this week. Our playard (pack 'n play) came last week and Jordan put that and the swing together this past weekend. LOVE both of them! My Mom is planning on coming over this coming weekend to help me go through the boxes of things that are being shipped to the house and getting everything squared away. Here's what we plan on doing this weekend:
-unpack boxes
-wash clothes/towels/blankets/etc
-put away clothes/towels/blankets/etc
-wash bottles and organize a cabinet in the kitchen that will just be for Logan's items
-install the car seat in my car and Jordan's car
-put everything from the shower in its correct place
-pack hospital bags for me and baby
-I'm sure there is more I'm forgetting!

Whew. It will be a busy weekend, but my Mom has been SO great about helping me. She came over last night and we made a short list of things we still need and she is going to go get it all this week so Jordan doesn't have to worry about it. I know Jordan appreciates her help just as much as I do! :)

Here are the things that still need to get done within the next 2 weeks:
-fill out paperwork for the pediatrician
-make to-to lists with things other people can do for us while I'm recovering in the hospital
-fill out insurance paperwork once baby arrives
-GET A HAIRCUT!!! I haven't gotten a haircut since August. I'm in desperate need of one.
-get my bedroom back to the way it once was by getting the mini-fridge and snack station out of here...I'm so tired of looking at it!

I have to say...I'm feeling good about our progress. I'm not nearly as overwhelmed as I was just a few weeks ago. It's all coming together. I can't thank our families enough for all of their help in preparing for Logan's arrival! I'm a very anal, over-prepared person so it has been difficult to not be able to do all of these things myself. However, Jordan and I are so grateful that our parents have done so much already to make sure we are not stressed these last few weeks!

I will post my weekly update tomorrow...34 weeks. WOW. I can't believe I met my second goal for myself. Some of the nurses in the hospital didn't think I would make it this far and it feels so good to prove them wrong! Keep on cookin' Logan, keep on cookin'!

Apparently I'm lucky enough to be the 1%

***I will give you fair warning that I'm not "happy" today. I'm having one of those "low" days that comes along with bed rest after 11 weeks. I'll try to write a happier post tomorrow or Friday.

How far along? 33 weeks, 1 day
Weight gain/loss: Gained back those 3 pounds I had lost...back to +12 from pre-pregnancy
Maternity clothes? regular t-shirts and sweatpants at home...maternity clothes when I go to the doctor. I put on my size 2 maternity blue jean capris today! I haven't worn them since about 17 weeks and I was very surprised to see they still fit.
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? Thinking about sleep, or lack there of, makes me want to cry...all the time.
Best moment this week? My baby shower! I will post about it another day.
Food cravings: Nothing really
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? 24 hour dance party still going strong!
What I miss? sleeeeeeeeeep...and what it feels like to not itch
What I'm looking forward to: Getting the stitch out soon.
Milestones: 33 weeks is a milestone.

Jordan and I went to our high risk doctor on Monday and Logan looked perfect! He is still my big boy and is now 5lbs 7 oz at only 33 weeks. For those of you who don't know, Jordan was born at 33 weeks and weighed 5lbs 6oz. Soooo...Logan is taking after his daddy size wise. Before we left, I mentioned being tested for cholestasis (google it!) and the doctor said if the results were positive, I would need to be started on meds ASAP, have weekly non-stress tests done, and would need to be induced early to ensure the safety of the baby. At this point, we had not received the results of my blood work yet, so that night I left a message with my other doctor's nurse explaining what the high-risk doctor recommended and asked if my lab results were back yet.

I heard back from my doctor's nurse late yesterday afternoon. Turns out that I do, in fact, have cholestasis. This liver disorder is so rare that it only effects about 1% of all pregnant women. Of this 1%, it usually occurs in women carrying multiples or women who have a history of liver issues. I don't have either. Really? REALLY? I just want to scream, "WHY ME?" *Here goes my pity party. I feel like I've been through so much already. I go from having a super doctor's appointment to getting information like this. I'm so miserable right now. I can't stop itching and I can no longer sleep at night. Imagine the worst itch you've ever had. Multiply that times 100 and have it be over your entire body. That's what I deal with on a daily basis. Nothing helps. I scratch and scratch and scratch, but the itch NEVER goes away. As I sit here typing this, I'm so exhausted I can hardly keep my eyes open, yet I can't sleep. My bile acid levels were only 1 point over the "normal" range so I can't even imagine what this must feel like in a severe case...and I NEVER want to find out.

Once I got the results, the doctor called in medicine that I now take twice a day until Logan arrives. I have been told by my brother, who is a doctor, and my regular doctor that the medicine should start relieving some of the itching soon. I wish it would hurry up! My doctor wanted to see me ASAP today for my first non-stress test. It was pretty easy, thank goodness. They hooked me up to the monitor to watch for contractions, listen to Logan's heartbeat, and I had to push a button every time he moved. It only lasted about 15 minutes and then I met with my doctor. Logan looked great during the test. Basically, I will see my doctor every 4 to 5 days from now until delivery to have non-stress tests and ultrasounds. This is all due to the risks associated with cholestasis, which I will NOT go in to because I just don't want to let my mind go there.

Typically, women with cholestasis are induced no later than 37 weeks. I asked about that today and my doctor said it's still a little to early to tell. We will have to take it one non-stress test at a time. It might mean that the stitch comes out sooner than 36 weeks and it might mean a c-section. I was praying today the doctor would give me a set in stone end date and I'm starting to wish for a c-section. I've already proven to myself how strong I am and a normal delivery is not that important to me. I don't need to prove anything else to myself or anyone else. What I NEED is a healthy baby boy in my arms. If ANYTHING looks somewhat "iffy" during one of these tests, Logan will be delivered that day. It's too risky to leave him in there and having him safe in the NICU would be better than the alternative. Soooo...I go back in 2 days for an ultrasound because they didn't have time to do one today. Please, PLEASE, pray for little Logan these next few weeks.

It's hard to not get depressed at this stage in the game. I have been through so much already and I just want my baby to be safe. Every time I think about the things that have gone wrong, I remind myself how lucky we were to get pregnant on the first try, how lucky we are that Logan is healthy, and how lucky we are to have doctors who have stayed on top of everything to keep Logan "cooking." Still, today I'm just exhausted, both mentally and physically. Everyone has been SO great and supportive, but today is just one of those bad days where I just want to cry all day.

I will post a bump picture and details about my baby shower this weekend. Those are happy things that I will save for a different post!

32 weeks...EIGHT MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!

How far along? 32 weeks, 1 day
Weight gain/loss: I've lost 3 pounds since my last appointment, which was 2 weeks ago. How is this happening??? I'm about +9 pounds from pre-pregnancy.
Maternity clothes? mix of both
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? Still awful...mostly because of my itching.
Best moment this week? A few things this week: 1. Making HUGE progress in Logan's nursery. Jordan and I keep going in there and staring at everything and talking about how cute it is. 2. Getting $2500 in redistribution money from the DATE Grant at work. 3. My doctor's appointment today!
Food cravings: Nothing really
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? 24 hour dance party still going strong!
What I miss? This week I have REALLY missed some Chuy's. mmmmm. I can't wait to go eat there when I hit 36 weeks and I sneak out of the house! hehe
What I'm looking forward to: My first baby shower on Saturday!
Milestones: EIGHT MONTHS!

Well...I made it to eight months and have survived 10 weeks of bed rest! I honestly can't believe how far I've come. I'm so proud of our baby boy for cooperating and hanging out for so long. Today was my 32 week appt back at my regular doctor. As usual, it started off with an ultrasound to get Logan's measurements. Here are his stats:

heart rate: 154 bpm
head: measuring over 35 weeks
tummy: measuring over 34 weeks
weight: 5 pounds even! F-I-V-E pounds. What a big boy!

My doctor's first words when he walked in the room were "this is getting to be a BIG baby." I knew Logan had just gone through a big growth spurt. I was SO uncomfortable last week and I've been so hungry lately. I guess he's taking all the nutrients from me and that's why I'm losing weight. So strange. Anyway, my doctor gave me the "game plan" for the rest of the pregnancy. I won't go back to see him until 35 weeks (what in the world will I do with myself! ha). At 35 weeks, it will just be an office visit...no ultrasound since my cervix is still the same (wahoo!!!) and we know the baby is big. I will then go back at 36 weeks and the stitch will be removed. Also, at that time I will be taken off the pump, will stop having to monitor, and won't have to get weekly progesterone shots anymore. HOLY COW! Basically, my doctor won't stop labor after this point. We could have a baby very soon thereafter, or I could end up going another 2-3 weeks. Either way, week 36 will be awesome!

In the past month or so, I've developed severe itching. We're talking claw your skin off it's so bad. I've not been able to sleep at night and it is absolutely miserable. A few weeks ago, I called my doctor's nurse and she said there really wasn't anything I could do and that I could take Benadryl. I did that for a while, but last week I just couldn't stand it anymore. I called her again and she called me back and said my doctor was calling in a steroid cream. She said my doctor also gave the ok to allow me to take an Aveeno oatmeal bath. Since I got the cerclage, I haven't been able to soak in a tub. When she said he was now ok with it, it was like music to my ears...it was H-E-A-V-E-N. When I went to the doctor today, I mentioned the itching again and told my doctor that it gets really bad on my hands and feet. I guess the nurse failed to mention that part to my doctor. After my appointment, I was sent over to the hospital to have my blood drawn to check my bile acid levels. There is a condition called cholestasis that pregnant women can get. It's when the flow of bile from the liver gets blocked. The major symptom is itching on the hands and feet. Treatment usually requires extra monitoring of the baby and sometimes leads to inducing labor to ensure the safety of the baby. I should be getting those results this afternoon. We'll see.

Now to the exciting stuff! We got so much knocked out in Logan's nursery this weekend. Jordan and his Dad installed a ceiling fan, my parents came over and we washed blankets/towels/organized dresser drawers and the closet, and Jordan hung all of the artwork on the walls. Logan's room is TOO. STINKIN. CUTE. I will post pictures sometime next week. I am having the big "nursery reveal" at my baby shower this weekend! Amber and Jenny (my sister-in-laws) are throwing me my first shower on Saturday! It was going to be at Amber's house until I was put on bed rest so now we are having it at my house. The only thing I know about the shower is what time it starts and what kind of cake we're having. hehe. I'm sooooo excited. I will be having 2 more showers, but they will not be until after Logan arrives. My Mom is going to host a "sip and see" and then my friend, Emily, is hosting my shower at work. It will be fun to have those 2 events to look forward to after the baby arrives!

I think that's all for now. It's hard to believe that I just have to make it FOUR more weeks and then this baby will be ready to come at any time. It's so close! I am one excited Momma.