Monday, January 31, 2011

We're getting closerrrrrr....

Sometimes it feels like I've been pregnant forever...and sometimes it feels like it's going by SO FAST. I can't believe that tomorrow is February and there is a VERY good chance our little March lucky charm will turn into a February love bug. aahhhh. Logan is all I can think about these days. I go in his room, sit in his glider, and just stare at everything. My lifelong dream of becoming a Mommy is weeks away and I could not be more excited. It also makes my heart so happy to see how excited Jordan is getting. This baby is all we talk about these days and I love when he kisses me goodbye in the morning and says, "You two have a great day!" He really is going to be the best Daddy. I love how he talks to my tummy every night before bed and how Logan jumps as soon as he hears his Daddy's voice. I can't wait to start this brand new journey with my two favorite boys! We are going to have SO. MUCH. FUN. :)

My last post was kind of depressing...sorry about that. After I wrote everything, I had one of the worst nights. I was unbelievably tired and the itching was insane that night. I fell asleep pretty easily around 8:30. When I got up for one of my 500 restroom breaks, I was thinking, "wow...I fell asleep fast and it must be 3 or 4 am." I looked at my phone before getting back into bed...big mistake. It was only 10 pm. I immediately burst into tears. The itching was so bad and I didn't know how I was going to be able to fall back asleep. I didn't want to wake Jordan up so I called my Mom and just bawled like a baby. She convinced me to take 2 Benadryl to knock myself out. I took an Aveeno bath, took 2 Benadryl, and went out on the couch to watch tv so I wouldn't bother Hubs. Needless to say, the medicine worked pretty quickly. I passed out almost immediately and woke up around 1 am to go get back in bed. I felt pretty good the next morning. It's amazing what no sleep will do to an already hormonal pregnant lady. It's not pretty.

On Friday, I had a biophysical ultrasound to check on our little man. They checked his heart and the blood flow through his umbilical cord. All looks well!! I then, briefly, met with my doctor and I mentioned the no sleeping thing. He suggested trying Tylenol PM instead. I've been taking that ever since and, knock on wood, I've been able to sleep a little better. He also said my appointments will now be every Tuesday and Friday until I deliver. He doesn't want to let me go more than 3-4 days without seeing a doctor. Fine by me!! I LOVE seeing my baby and hearing his little heart beat. It is the most wonderful thing in the world. Next appointment is tomorrow, 34 weeks!!!, and I will have another non-stress test. It's hard to believe that I only have TWO more weeks until the stitch comes out, the pump comes out of my leg, I don't have to do any more monitoring, and Jordan doesn't have to give me my weekly shot. CRAZY! Jordan and I have big plans for the day I get the stitch out! We are going out to dinner and making a trip to Target. haha. I promised him I would sit in a wheelchair or use a motorized scooter so I didn't have to walk. I don't care what anyone says, I deserve to go out and do these 2 things!!!

I promised in my last post to talk about my baby shower. WOW! It was truly amazing. Two of my wonderful sister-in-laws, Amber and Jenny, went all out for their nephew. They have been planning this since we announced we were pregnant. They are SO excited to meet Logan and it makes me so happy to see how much love they already have for this little boy. I didn't have a clue as to anything that was going to happen. The only specifications I gave Amber was that I didn't want the typical "baby blue" baby shower. I hate the color baby blue...yuck. They chose a Dr. Seuss theme and everything was decked out in primary colors. It was adorable. The original plan was to have it at Amber's house, but that changed when I was put on bed rest. They came over about 10 am on Saturday morning and I was summoned to stay in my room until everything was ready. When I finally got the ok to go out and see everything, I started crying. Everything was so cute and well thought out. They had spent so much time making everything so special for me and baby boy. I just kept thinking, "Wow. I'M having a baby. This is for MY baby." It was very surreal. We had an awesome turnout...around 20 people, great food, delicious cake (duh...Jenny made it!), cute favors, and Logan was spoiled rotten. I have been so worried about getting all the necessities since I've been on bed rest. My friends definitely helped ease my anxiety. Logan got so many awesome things!

Since we potentially only have 2 more weekends, maybe 3, we will be tying up all the loose ends ASAP. I have ordered some final things we absolutely need right away and they should be delivered this week. Our playard (pack 'n play) came last week and Jordan put that and the swing together this past weekend. LOVE both of them! My Mom is planning on coming over this coming weekend to help me go through the boxes of things that are being shipped to the house and getting everything squared away. Here's what we plan on doing this weekend:
-unpack boxes
-wash clothes/towels/blankets/etc
-put away clothes/towels/blankets/etc
-wash bottles and organize a cabinet in the kitchen that will just be for Logan's items
-install the car seat in my car and Jordan's car
-put everything from the shower in its correct place
-pack hospital bags for me and baby
-I'm sure there is more I'm forgetting!

Whew. It will be a busy weekend, but my Mom has been SO great about helping me. She came over last night and we made a short list of things we still need and she is going to go get it all this week so Jordan doesn't have to worry about it. I know Jordan appreciates her help just as much as I do! :)

Here are the things that still need to get done within the next 2 weeks:
-fill out paperwork for the pediatrician
-make to-to lists with things other people can do for us while I'm recovering in the hospital
-fill out insurance paperwork once baby arrives
-GET A HAIRCUT!!! I haven't gotten a haircut since August. I'm in desperate need of one.
-get my bedroom back to the way it once was by getting the mini-fridge and snack station out of here...I'm so tired of looking at it!

I have to say...I'm feeling good about our progress. I'm not nearly as overwhelmed as I was just a few weeks ago. It's all coming together. I can't thank our families enough for all of their help in preparing for Logan's arrival! I'm a very anal, over-prepared person so it has been difficult to not be able to do all of these things myself. However, Jordan and I are so grateful that our parents have done so much already to make sure we are not stressed these last few weeks!

I will post my weekly update tomorrow...34 weeks. WOW. I can't believe I met my second goal for myself. Some of the nurses in the hospital didn't think I would make it this far and it feels so good to prove them wrong! Keep on cookin' Logan, keep on cookin'!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Apparently I'm lucky enough to be the 1%

***I will give you fair warning that I'm not "happy" today. I'm having one of those "low" days that comes along with bed rest after 11 weeks. I'll try to write a happier post tomorrow or Friday.

How far along?
33 weeks, 1 day
Weight gain/loss: Gained back those 3 pounds I had lost...back to +12 from pre-pregnancy
Maternity clothes? regular t-shirts and sweatpants at home...maternity clothes when I go to the doctor. I put on my size 2 maternity blue jean capris today! I haven't worn them since about 17 weeks and I was very surprised to see they still fit.
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? Thinking about sleep, or lack there of, makes me want to cry...all the time.
Best moment this week? My baby shower! I will post about it another day.
Food cravings: Nothing really
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? 24 hour dance party still going strong!
What I miss? sleeeeeeeeeep...and what it feels like to not itch
What I'm looking forward to: Getting the stitch out soon.
Milestones: 33 weeks is a milestone.

Jordan and I went to our high risk doctor on Monday and Logan looked perfect! He is still my big boy and is now 5lbs 7 oz at only 33 weeks. For those of you who don't know, Jordan was born at 33 weeks and weighed 5lbs 6oz. Soooo...Logan is taking after his daddy size wise. Before we left, I mentioned being tested for cholestasis (google it!) and the doctor said if the results were positive, I would need to be started on meds ASAP, have weekly non-stress tests done, and would need to be induced early to ensure the safety of the baby. At this point, we had not received the results of my blood work yet, so that night I left a message with my other doctor's nurse explaining what the high-risk doctor recommended and asked if my lab results were back yet.

I heard back from my doctor's nurse late yesterday afternoon. Turns out that I do, in fact, have cholestasis. This liver disorder is so rare that it only effects about 1% of all pregnant women. Of this 1%, it usually occurs in women carrying multiples or women who have a history of liver issues. I don't have either. Really? REALLY? I just want to scream, "WHY ME?" *Here goes my pity party. I feel like I've been through so much already. I go from having a super doctor's appointment to getting information like this. I'm so miserable right now. I can't stop itching and I can no longer sleep at night. Imagine the worst itch you've ever had. Multiply that times 100 and have it be over your entire body. That's what I deal with on a daily basis. Nothing helps. I scratch and scratch and scratch, but the itch NEVER goes away. As I sit here typing this, I'm so exhausted I can hardly keep my eyes open, yet I can't sleep. My bile acid levels were only 1 point over the "normal" range so I can't even imagine what this must feel like in a severe case...and I NEVER want to find out.

Once I got the results, the doctor called in medicine that I now take twice a day until Logan arrives. I have been told by my brother, who is a doctor, and my regular doctor that the medicine should start relieving some of the itching soon. I wish it would hurry up! My doctor wanted to see me ASAP today for my first non-stress test. It was pretty easy, thank goodness. They hooked me up to the monitor to watch for contractions, listen to Logan's heartbeat, and I had to push a button every time he moved. It only lasted about 15 minutes and then I met with my doctor. Logan looked great during the test. Basically, I will see my doctor every 4 to 5 days from now until delivery to have non-stress tests and ultrasounds. This is all due to the risks associated with cholestasis, which I will NOT go in to because I just don't want to let my mind go there.

Typically, women with cholestasis are induced no later than 37 weeks. I asked about that today and my doctor said it's still a little to early to tell. We will have to take it one non-stress test at a time. It might mean that the stitch comes out sooner than 36 weeks and it might mean a c-section. I was praying today the doctor would give me a set in stone end date and I'm starting to wish for a c-section. I've already proven to myself how strong I am and a normal delivery is not that important to me. I don't need to prove anything else to myself or anyone else. What I NEED is a healthy baby boy in my arms. If ANYTHING looks somewhat "iffy" during one of these tests, Logan will be delivered that day. It's too risky to leave him in there and having him safe in the NICU would be better than the alternative. Soooo...I go back in 2 days for an ultrasound because they didn't have time to do one today. Please, PLEASE, pray for little Logan these next few weeks.

It's hard to not get depressed at this stage in the game. I have been through so much already and I just want my baby to be safe. Every time I think about the things that have gone wrong, I remind myself how lucky we were to get pregnant on the first try, how lucky we are that Logan is healthy, and how lucky we are to have doctors who have stayed on top of everything to keep Logan "cooking." Still, today I'm just exhausted, both mentally and physically. Everyone has been SO great and supportive, but today is just one of those bad days where I just want to cry all day.

I will post a bump picture and details about my baby shower this weekend. Those are happy things that I will save for a different post!

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

32 weeks...EIGHT MONTHS!!!!!!!!!!

How far along? 32 weeks, 1 day
Weight gain/loss: I've lost 3 pounds since my last appointment, which was 2 weeks ago. How is this happening??? I'm about +9 pounds from pre-pregnancy.
Maternity clothes? mix of both
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? Still awful...mostly because of my itching.
Best moment this week? A few things this week: 1. Making HUGE progress in Logan's nursery. Jordan and I keep going in there and staring at everything and talking about how cute it is. 2. Getting $2500 in redistribution money from the DATE Grant at work. 3. My doctor's appointment today!
Food cravings: Nothing really
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? 24 hour dance party still going strong!
What I miss? This week I have REALLY missed some Chuy's. mmmmm. I can't wait to go eat there when I hit 36 weeks and I sneak out of the house! hehe
What I'm looking forward to: My first baby shower on Saturday!
Milestones: EIGHT MONTHS!

Well...I made it to eight months and have survived 10 weeks of bed rest! I honestly can't believe how far I've come. I'm so proud of our baby boy for cooperating and hanging out for so long. Today was my 32 week appt back at my regular doctor. As usual, it started off with an ultrasound to get Logan's measurements. Here are his stats:

heart rate: 154 bpm
head: measuring over 35 weeks
tummy: measuring over 34 weeks
weight: 5 pounds even! F-I-V-E pounds. What a big boy!

My doctor's first words when he walked in the room were "this is getting to be a BIG baby." I knew Logan had just gone through a big growth spurt. I was SO uncomfortable last week and I've been so hungry lately. I guess he's taking all the nutrients from me and that's why I'm losing weight. So strange. Anyway, my doctor gave me the "game plan" for the rest of the pregnancy. I won't go back to see him until 35 weeks (what in the world will I do with myself! ha). At 35 weeks, it will just be an office visit...no ultrasound since my cervix is still the same (wahoo!!!) and we know the baby is big. I will then go back at 36 weeks and the stitch will be removed. Also, at that time I will be taken off the pump, will stop having to monitor, and won't have to get weekly progesterone shots anymore. HOLY COW! Basically, my doctor won't stop labor after this point. We could have a baby very soon thereafter, or I could end up going another 2-3 weeks. Either way, week 36 will be awesome!

In the past month or so, I've developed severe itching. We're talking claw your skin off it's so bad. I've not been able to sleep at night and it is absolutely miserable. A few weeks ago, I called my doctor's nurse and she said there really wasn't anything I could do and that I could take Benadryl. I did that for a while, but last week I just couldn't stand it anymore. I called her again and she called me back and said my doctor was calling in a steroid cream. She said my doctor also gave the ok to allow me to take an Aveeno oatmeal bath. Since I got the cerclage, I haven't been able to soak in a tub. When she said he was now ok with it, it was like music to my ears...it was H-E-A-V-E-N. When I went to the doctor today, I mentioned the itching again and told my doctor that it gets really bad on my hands and feet. I guess the nurse failed to mention that part to my doctor. After my appointment, I was sent over to the hospital to have my blood drawn to check my bile acid levels. There is a condition called cholestasis that pregnant women can get. It's when the flow of bile from the liver gets blocked. The major symptom is itching on the hands and feet. Treatment usually requires extra monitoring of the baby and sometimes leads to inducing labor to ensure the safety of the baby. I should be getting those results this afternoon. We'll see.

Now to the exciting stuff! We got so much knocked out in Logan's nursery this weekend. Jordan and his Dad installed a ceiling fan, my parents came over and we washed blankets/towels/organized dresser drawers and the closet, and Jordan hung all of the artwork on the walls. Logan's room is TOO. STINKIN. CUTE. I will post pictures sometime next week. I am having the big "nursery reveal" at my baby shower this weekend! Amber and Jenny (my sister-in-laws) are throwing me my first shower on Saturday! It was going to be at Amber's house until I was put on bed rest so now we are having it at my house. The only thing I know about the shower is what time it starts and what kind of cake we're having. hehe. I'm sooooo excited. I will be having 2 more showers, but they will not be until after Logan arrives. My Mom is going to host a "sip and see" and then my friend, Emily, is hosting my shower at work. It will be fun to have those 2 events to look forward to after the baby arrives!

I think that's all for now. It's hard to believe that I just have to make it FOUR more weeks and then this baby will be ready to come at any time. It's so close! I am one excited Momma.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

31 weeks

How far along? 31 weeks
Weight gain/loss: +12 pounds from pre-pregnancy (I don't have a weekly appointment this week so it might be more...we'll see next week.) Jordan constantly tells me how small I look and how I look exactly the same but now have a "bump." He's too sweet. :)
Maternity clothes? mix of both
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? AWFUL this week. I've always been one to be able to sleep anywhere and at anytime. This week has been horrible. I've been in a lot of discomfort this week. I remember feeling this way at 24 weeks and that was when the baby was going through a huge growth spurt...maybe that's what is happening again. I took Benadryl 2 nights in a row this weekend and felt great when I woke up. I'm hoping it starts getting a little better soon...I don't know what I would do if I had to get up and go to work after my sleepless nights.
Best moment this week? Jordan's birthday last Friday. We had our families over, ate BBQ, and got to visit. It was great!
Food cravings: Chicken Friand from La Madeleine...but only because that's what Mom and Dad are bringing me for dinner. YUM. I haven't really had cravings at all while being pregnant.
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? 24 hour dance party still going strong!
What I miss? My nieces and nephews...get to see them in 11 days when they come in town for my baby shower! woohoo
What I'm looking forward to: PROJECT NURSERY which will be taking place this weekend! I've ordered quite a few fun things for Logan's room and I can't wait to see it all set up!
Milestones: Every day is a milestone. :)

So, I didn't have a weekly doctor appointment this week. However, we did meet Logan's pediatrician today! He will be going to the same doctor Jordan went to as a baby. Jordan's Mom went with us to help us ask questions. We REALLY like him and I feel soooooo much better now that we've met him and I can cross that off my never ending to-do list. He was very calm, relaxed, and I love that he has so much experience. My main reason for wanting to meet him before Logan arrives was to explain the situation with the spot in Logan's tummy. WHEW.

Not much else to report this week. My next doctor's appointment is next Wednesday. Here's my "bump" pictures for 31 weeks:

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

30 Weeks...the "home stretch!"


How far along? 30 weeks
Weight gain/loss: +12 pounds from pre-pregnancy
Maternity clothes? mix of both
Stretch marks? None yet
Sleep? Not the best, but it could be worse.
Best moment this week? Spending a low-key New Year's Eve with Jordan!
Food cravings: Nada
Gender: BOY
Belly button in or out? In
Movement? All the time. We were lying in bed one night this week (I was on the computer and Jordan was watching football) and we decided to put headphones on my tummy so Logan could hear his lullabies. He's heard them many times before, but on this night I think he wanted nothing to do with them. He pushed his little foot so hard against my stomach that he kicked the headphones off multiple times. Jordan then changed the music to some Beatles and other non-lullaby music and he settled down. Go figure.
What I miss? I'm really missing my students and co-workers.
What I'm looking forward to: Jordan's 26th birthday on Friday!!! He ruined his surprise and got himself the ipodTouch I had planned on getting him. That boy is so impatient when it comes to electronics. Now I have NO idea what to get him...
Milestones: 30 weeks! Also, Friday marks EIGHT weeks of bedrest. I can't believe it's already been that long. Even though the days can get long and boring, it seems to be going by pretty fast when I think about how long it has been. I hope the rest of my time goes just as fast!


I had my 30 week appointment back with my regular doctor today. ALL GOOD THINGS. I'm liking this pattern! We'll start with Logan's stats:

heart rate= 154 bpm
weight= 3lbs 12oz (up 6 oz in a week!!! GROW, BABY, GROW!)
head measurement= 33 weeks (97th percentile...poor Mommy)
overall measurement= 31 weeks 6 days...that means he is measuring almost TWO full weeks ahead. WOOHOO! I really think he is going to be a February baby....and that's ok with me!

Other updates: My cervix was 1.58cm...which means it hasn't gotten shorter in over 4 weeks now! Bedrest must really be working. Doctor says my weight is fine, even though I haven't gained what most women have by this point in their pregnancy. I'm hoping that means it will all come off relatively quickly...a girl can dream, right? Since things have stayed the same for over a month now, I don't have to go back to the doctor for 2 more weeks. Before we left, I asked about getting "privileges" back (sitting in a wheelchair and going to a store, restaurant, etc) and my doctor laughed and said, "you can have your privileges with baby #2 after we do a cerclage at 12 weeks." Not exactly what I was hoping for, but I understand it's for the best. He said the stitch will come out between 34-35 weeks! My thoughts are that once the stitch comes out, all bets are off. I'm not going to go crazy and resume my normal lifestyle, but you better believe I'm not staying in bed ALL day. :)

Another reason I believe I'm not getting privileges is because of what happened this past Sunday morning. I woke up and did my routine monitoring session. I had 7 contractions within the hour and they were 5-6 minutes apart. Anything over 6 contractions in an hour is when doctors and nurses start worrying...especially when they are coming in a pattern. I was also able to feel all of them, also not good. They weren't painful, just a tightening sensation. I'm pretty sure these were Braxton Hicks contractions (which are normal for any pregnant lady at this stage in the game) because I've been having them for a couple of weeks now. However, the fact that they were in a pattern was what was making me and the nurses worry. I was given an extra dose of medicine and then had to remonitor an hour later. Things had calmed down by then. Sunday night, the nurses bumped up my continuous dosage to try to knock out all the irritability I've been having. Since then, my strips have looked good. Still having lots of Braxton Hicks contractions throughout the day, but my doctor said that's normal. Sooooo, I'm sure this is another reason my doctor doesn't want to ease up on things. Doesn't look like I'll be seeing the inside of a Target for at least another 4-5 weeks...DARN. :)

All in all, I can't complain. When I was at 22 weeks and all of this began, 30 weeks seemed so far away and I didn't know how I would make it until then. Now that it's here, I have to say that I'm proud of myself for keeping this little guy cooking without a return trip to the hospital. Four more weeks, four more weeks, four more weeks...that's my next goal for myself! And within these next 4 weeks, I have lots of things to look forward to: Jordan's birthday, decorating/finishing the nursery, meeting Logan's pediatrician, my baby shower hosted by 2 of my awesome sister-in-laws, my last visit with the high-risk doctor, and hopefully finishing up any last minute details before we welcome our son into the world! I have a feeling it's going to fly by! I. CAN. NOT. WAIT.