On Wednesday morning at 8 am, my status had not changed. My doctor made the decision to start trying magnesium. Let me just say that if you haven't heard about this drug, it is the worst possible medicine you would ever want to take. I have not talked to a single woman who was put on it who had a good experience. It was a nightmare. Thank goodness Jordan took off work that day to be with me and thank goodness his mom was with me that night. However, I don't think they were so excited that that happened to be the day/night they chose to stay with me. Bless their hearts!
The magnesium was started through my IV that morning. I was warned that it might make me a little nauseous, so to take it easy on breakfast. Well, I decided I was feeling okay so Jordan ordered me pancakes and sausage. I ate it all. Lunch rolled around and same thing...I was feeling like a champ. Maybe I was going to be a "lucky one." HA.
At about 4:30, Jordan's mom left us to go to a doctor's appointment. She was going to bring back Los Cucos for dinner...my favorite. About 30 minutes after she left, all hell broke loose. I started vomiting uncontrollably and I couldn't move any of my limbs. Everything felt like dead weight. This continued until about 2 pm the next day. I really thought I was dying. On top of it all, the only thing I could think of was what it was doing to my baby. I kept be assured that he was fine and only after speaking to my brother, who is a doctor, did I believe them. The magnesium doesn't cross into the baby's bloodstream...thank God. There were, again, lots of tears and thinking about how I didn't know how I was going to get through this much longer.
My dad came to see me at noon the next day. I cried again. I was so miserable. My doctor made his rounds around 1 pm and I told him about how terrible my night was. He explained that he took the magnesium to a level 4 (highest they will go), brought it down .5g each hour, and then took it back up again in the hopes that it would wipe out those little contractions I kept having. He PROMISED me that it would not go that high again and then he even had then nurses turn the pump completely off for the next 1 1/2 hours to give my body a rest. Sweet relief. I could finally eat a popsicle without throwing up. After the time off, the pump was turned back on and left at 1.5g per hour for the next 4 days.
Over the next 4 days, I went in and out of phases of thinking I could handle all of this. It seemed as though the end was no where in sight. However, my baby was still alive...inside of me and that's when I changed my thinking to, "I have no choice. I will do whatever I have to do for Logan. It's all about Logan."
Did I mention that I got to have a catheter the whole time I was on the magnesium. Lovely. I wasn't allowed to leave my bed for 4 days straight. Literally. Except for Friday night. I had another break down that day and the sweet nurse said she would ask if I could have a shower. That's all I wanted. A shower. Clean hair. That's it. She asked the on call doctor and came in shouting, "Girl, we've got 10 minutes!!!" In those 10 minutes, I shuffled to the bathroom, sat in a chair in the tub while Jordan washed my hair, the nurse washed my back, and another nurse switched the sheets on my bed. It was quick, but it was so worth it. I felt like a new woman!
My wonderful husband then spent the next 48 hours with me. We watched movies, ate non-hospital food, and hunkered down for the weekend in the hopes that I could leave on Monday. I wish that was the case.
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